Day 40- The End and the Beginning

I can't believe it! I am done! This amazing journey has come to an end. Even though as of tomorrow I don't have to go into the studio, I will continue the growth I have started.

I feel amazing and body looks terrific. I see muscles now that I didn't even think I had. Before I felt swollen and gross, but with Joschi's help I found what I feel is the real me. It wasn't always easy and there was a few times I really felt like quitting but thanks to the fantastic energy of the studio, working out felt more like an escape then something I had to force myself to do. Now it is also a routine that is a part of my life. Keeping my body in top physical condition is not something I have to do, it is something I want to do. I can't ever go back to the feeling I had before of being adequate. Instead I really feel like I am a better person for following through on my commitment to do this 40 day challenge. I really hope there are others like me who have gone on this journey or will choose to do it next time it's offered. Even if someone decided to just do it on there own there is great power on making a commitment and following through. In the beginning of the year I would have celebrated by buying a cake or something but now I feel like it would be better to go dancing.

Day 39- Tomorrow Celebration

Last night my internet went out as I was writing my entry for the day.

I am almost there. One more day to go! I am so excited. I went to class at noon and it was packed. I still feel much stronger now than I have since I was in my twenties. I am wondering if we will really get this alleged snow storm tomorrow. Nothing is going to stop me from finishing my 40 day challenge. Not a headache and certainly not a little snow storm. Tomorrow I have to come up with a good way to celebrate that won't sabotoge my efforts to get healthy. Hmm... what should I do?

Day 38- 2 days to go

I went to Athletic Yoga today. A thousand candles, arm balances... it was fun. I actually had a hard time bringing my cleaning practice that I did yesterday into the class at first. I had some issues at work that I was trying to figure out how to solve as we were moving but once we really started moving that all went away. Once I was in the zone nothing existed but my breath, lots of sweat and moving... hey, that's all the things the video advertised! [http://www.joschinyc.com/video.html just in case you haven't seen it yet]

I am so close to finishing but at this point it isn't about the finish line anymore. It is about the changes I have seen in my mind and my body. I can't believe I waited so long to commit yoga into my life, but I guess it really is never to late, is it?

Close and Personal with my Appliances

I took the day off. I feel great but I wanted to take a lazy day for myself. I was great. I gave my apartment some love. I move furniture around, cleaned things we never think of cleaning and I did it very yogic. Sounds silly huh? I read something online about how using cleaning as a meditation can be very soothing so I wanted to try it. I didn't turn on music or anything. I simply got my supplies out and gave all my attention to the cabinets, the outer door of the refrigerator, the microwave above the stove... wherever I was cleaning I gave all my attention to that spot. It was amazing how fast my day went doing this. It was moving for me because when I was done I had a whole different perspective of my appliances. Now of course had you been in the room with me you would have thought I was OCD or something but it made my environment here at home more... energy filled? I am not sure what, but it sure does feel like a special kitchen right now.

I look forward to taking what I discovered about myself today into the studio. What a strange wonderful journey I am on...

Day 37- Un-Snowed In

I woke up this morning expecting to be up to my eyeballs in snow but as I made my way to the studio my shoe laces didn't even get wet. Snow storm my foot... Anyway, I was thinking that maybe they just misjudged when it would happen so an early class will give me all day to be all snowed in with my fuzzy red slippers, warm tea and Weeds Season 4. I guess I wasn't the only one expecting the snow showers to come later because class was full to the brim. I don't know why I am always so surprised that morning classes are full. Who doesn't want Joschi's mean German energy early in the morning? I enjoyed class very much. Still feel like I learn something about myself every time my mat touches the beautiful black floors. After class I ran directly home still mentally hoping to be snowed in for the weekend but alas, It wasn't to be. Half way through the day I thought, "why the heck shouldn't I still enjoy my snowed in activities?" So, I did! Is it embarrassing to say that I grabbed a stuffed animal too? It was a bear.

Day 35 and 36- Hot Date

I have had an amazing few days. I didn't write yesterday because I had an amazing hot date. I went to the studio both days and enjoyed class in a fog of positivity. I had a great conversation with my mom, I reconnected with an old friend... it has just been an amazing week for me. My body feels absolutely amazing and I look amazing. I lost 10 pounds and I can actually see muscles! I can see muscles!! I have a pack. Not exactly a 6 pack but I see them there and I have totally confidence now that if i eat right and continue to exercise my body will only get better and better. I get it now that being fit takes persistence. I was never obese or anything but i had always gotten pissed off when I heard skinny women talk about it takes time, eating right and lots of exercise. I just assumed they were born with the skinny jean. I still believe some women are super skinny because they are naturally that way but for the rest of us, exercise can take us there if we are persistent enough.

Day 34- Home Practice

After my epiphany yesterday, I really feel like I have made some big steps in my life. Its amazing how little steps everyday lead to big changes in life. Unfortunately, I didn't get a chance to get to the studio today. I really wanted to try pilates this morning with Angela but I didn't get a chance then the rest of the day got away from me. When I got home I was a little upset that I didn't get a chance to move my body and then I thought, why not move now? Sarah's classes encourage us to move with our breath so I took a sequence we always did in class and did that a few times to my favorite playlist. I spent maybe 15 minutes doing what I could remember from Joschi's awesome flows and then I did some of my favorite stretches. I am know it isn't the same as being in class but at least I did something. I really look forward to coming back to the studio and moving with the class but practicing by myself was an interesting experience. I really had no choice but to move with my own rhythm. I think now when we do it in class I will be even more connected to my body. I am looking forward to that!

Day 33- The Light With In

Another long day at work but took my stress to the studio. Today one of my coworkers approached me and said "Abby, there is something different about you." I have lost like 7 and a half pounds but she insisted that wasn't it. "You glow Abby!" She continued to tell me that I seemed happier and not so affected by the crud that goes on in the office. I hadn't thought about it till she said something but for the first time since I started working there, I haven't gotten bend out of shape because of the shenanigans in the office. Instead I go with the flow, without judgment. For those times when I do get a little upset, I find now after the last month at the studio I can focus on the breath and cool myself down. My office is stressful but after this journey I finally don't have to be as effected by the madness outside myself. That is a beautiful thing

Day 32- PJ pants

I had a really long day but I went through my day empowered. I feel really great about my body. I did cheat on my diet this weekend but I feel like I have improved. As I was getting ready for bed I put on a pair of pj pants I haven't been able to wear in 2 years!... They aren't comfortable yet, but I could button them! Hey, Don't judge me. I thought it was an accomplishment.

Anyway, I went to the athletic class and it was different today. It was the perfect amount of hard. It pushed me, I sweated a ton but I could do it so I felt like a successful yogi.